Tag Archives: Grow Up

You Might As Well Keep Living

4 Mar

Today is the birthday of a dear lady friend of mine, and I spent the eve of it with her. This year is a milestone birthday for her (I’ll be generous and not specify which as I do not want to contradict her online dating advertisement), and she was feeling ambivalent about this news. I decided to offer her a few words of my wisdom, which I shall now give to you here (even if your birthday is not today, this should be considered a gift and therefore you needn’t expect a card from me this year).

Many say “age is just a number” and they are right: age is the number of years that you have been alive and as that number grows, it’s likely that the number of years you have left to live is also decreasing. In other words, every birthday essentially signals death closing in. Think about this, though: actually, every single day you live is  moving you nearer to the grave. While this may bring us comfort when thinking of our enemies, it’s unlikely we think it about ourselves every morning as we wake. So why dwell on it once a year, especially on your “special day”?

Therefore, my advice to anyone celebrating a birthday today is to blow out your candles and open your presents without any thought of the fact that soon you’ll be dead.

Have a drink on me, birthday boys and girls!*


*Drinks will not be reimbursed.